オタク女... you know?

Nowadays, I'm オタク女 now.

Don't know オタク女? How about Otaku then?

of course this is not me, i don't have front fringe okay.

Conclusion, 

I'm SO LIFELESS NOW.

Yes I don't have any plan for now. Thought I might chilling outside everyday or other places, but none of it. But still, it could be beneficial while staying at home since I'm lazy person & most important is,

I NEED TO BALANCE MY SKIN TONE. 

It is getting worse ever since I joined marching competition & starts to take bus every schooling day. As stated I'm lazy, I never apply any whitening cream or skin products that contain SPF ^15. Sigh, why I so lazy?

Everytime when I signed into Facebook I'll see something like "Oh I just got my job!" "Movie marathon" "Chilling at XX place" "Going XX with YY" Ugh, I'm so jealous with those who has things to do.

Minor thing to say,

As you can see I've changed my layout, ONCE AGAIN! It's GirlGeneration's How Great is Your Love for the auto play & T-ara's Cry Cry for the manual play. Both are my favorite song currently & I'm sharing it to everyone!

I'm sorry to those who doesn't like autoplay music on my blog. You have no choice but just listening to it. I'm forcing you guys to love Girl's Generation anyway. /evil

Okay, I need to continue my otaku life again. Will post up more since it's a HOLIDAY! *yayness*

you are, psycho.

Yes it does.

Knock me down? I'll crack it first.

I changed my freaking e-mail. Oh yeah. My previous yahoo email was not working and now I created one. xiying@live.com.my. Hah, I love this e-mail since I no need to type any special character like number. Current e-mail is too long and this, just my name, that's the only part I love. Was thinking to put jaeying at first but then it is kinda, weird.

Yesterday I was damn fking pissed off with a guy who speaks like a jerk.

To that typical person,
We don't really close, so please mind your words & your own business. Your words really annoy me. I tried to speak with you nicely but you make it even worse. That's fine, that's your problem. Your attitude, your words are epic fail. That's the reason why I hate people who is not educated well.

Okay, chill baby chill. Luckily I surfed net & saw a very nice phrase that could chill myself out. & every sentences in that phrase is really nice. Well, I think the most meaningful is,

一个人如果不能从内心去原谅别人，那他就永远不会心安理得。

If one's can't forgive a person with their truth heart, then he will not get the peace forever.

YES, I FORGIVE YOU. I'm not gonna kill my million cells or billion perhaps on you. I need  my cells for my growth. So I should calm myself down for my own sake.

Chill :)

I found myself not as active as last time when comes to updating the blog. Seriously, this year is tough & busy for me. Everything seems like so different. But I enjoy study! Teachers make me go crazy about school & homework and now, I love school :D

Cr : Banner, Phase

Show em' what's your worth.

Last 17 hours, was hanging' out with my friends, buddy, partner, bestie, BFF. First outing in 2o11, for me. Hmm, wonder when will be the next? I think we are getting busy & busy since this is a form 5 life.

Shopping around & bought a Tee. It's the same with that threeeee bffs. If you ever get a chance & hang out with us, you'll see it, Hehs. Whatever you think, I don't care. Bitchin' around, that's your problem. I may rude or impolite to you. What are you going to do? Talking bad all the way? Cursing all the way? Okay, I'm not gonna sacrifice my 12millions of cells on you. Respect if you wanna be respected.

My mum drove to Jusco to fetch me just now. I told her that I was in the bus & on the way home. But she never scold me, this is weird! When I asked her again where did she drop by, she told me Bukit Raja. And my sister even worse, she thought I went to sunway & she was thinking fetch me back after she finished her work. I told my mum that I wanna buy that odm watch when we were having dinner. Since she keep quiet, means I succeed, yay me! What am I trying to say? Simple & Easy, I'm loved by my family.

I think next time I should claim a iPhone 5 & see what's my parent's reaction. Will they buy? HAHA.

Finally, I watched "Great Day". I love this movie damn god much! 

Ask me how was it, I can tell you, it was impeccable.
Ask how long I've cried, I can tell you, 1 hour non-stop.
Ask me why is it nice, I can tell you, it is really touching & meaningful.
Ask me what I rated, I can tell you, it is 5 over 5!
Ask me describe & tell, I can tell you, why not get your ass off & watch it now?! 

Seriously you'll cry if you watched it. Unless your system is a bit abnormal or you're just freaking cold blooded. Don't hide your feeling, just cry. "This is not my style." Don't crap this in front of me. I won't believe. Aren't everybody has feeling?

Here is music to share. Every time I hear, my heart is aching. I miss them. :(

My advice to everyone, 

Don't ever being obscene & indecent in the public. This is Malaysia, not USA.

I hate today, really.

Today is kind of worse. I can't believe myself woke up late in the morning. And of course, I'm late for school for about 15 mins. Today, 12 Jan is my first time I late for school in my high school life. Yes I’m serious, I never late for school before except today! Isn't my alarm working or what? Or maybe I was too tired? Every Tuesday is a nightmare for me. I need to stay in school for 10 hours then go tuition for another 6 hours. I spent almost 2/3 of my day just to study! Oh god, how I wish there will be 48 hours in Tuesday! 

I’m such a busy person just like the CEO in a company. I’m totally stressed out. 4 more notice boards waiting for me, presentation as my oral test,  builds up a model of a roller coaster, write synopsis for a story every twice in a month & so on. I’m a human, not a robot. Please think whether I can do it or not but not just picking me because I know how to. I lost my inspiration and interests for arts & I hate arts since that day I quit learning arts. Why are you guys pulling me back to the world again?

I finally understand why is our Prime Minister thinks that “1 Malaysia” is so important these days. I can see the true color of this world now. Wow, I never regret for sitting bus home, I should be glad. Okay today, bus is kind of crowd since it is the time for the schools’ activities end and private schools’ students finish their studies. I wonder, do the private schools teach “1 Malaysia” concept? I’m home just for a while. And just now there was quite lot of primary kids sitting bus home. Yes, the bus is really crowded. And I heard one of the students from private school is saying “omg, they are so smelly. I hate this smell. That’s why I don’t like ___.” I shouldn’t name the race relation. Yea, just because of this kind of people, this world has so much racist problems. Aren’t people who enters private school should be more polite and courteous? So what can I say? They spoil their image and their school image too. And I think these people really can send them to Sekolah Wawasan so they know how to respect other people :)

Okay let’s have an imagination now. Let’s think, you have a friend, who is so close with you. She/He did quite lot things for you that really helped you a lot especially you’re in trouble. But your mind thinks that “Yes, they should do this because she/he is my friend, of course she/he has to help me lah. If not I will hate her/him to the core!” Then you’re so wrong! Your friend isn’t your maid okay? Why should they do these things for you? Aren’t they having their own things to do? Why do they help you so much? There’s only two reasons.

One, they love you and they care for you. Of course the love is not only lovers. It can be friendship or family! Second, they hated you so much and trying to make your life worse.

But most of the reason is ONE. And now you are just like a kid who thinks that it is their “responsibility” to do all these things for you. What if they did not help you or failed to help you when you’re in trouble? Then you two have to be enemy? Just because of a small tiny thing then relationship go worse. In the end, who will care about the good and care? So, be thankful every time. If not, what for the thanksgiving session exists? I really hope everyone will care about the people around you.

Where's the peace? Smiles?

Okay, my storytelling ends here. There will be more and more complains in my blog. Soon, it will be a site for me to release my stress, Hah. So I must change, I need to think positively start from now. Life isn’t that hard right? There are always ups and downs in our life. So enjoy every moments you have. In the later age, it will be your sweet memories ever. JUST LIKE ME, I’m not that old but I miss my primary school life.

Credit : Banner

You said you will do it, but you break it.

“I’m getting so frustrated, so I’m going to write a few things…
No matter how I see it, this isn’t right.
How could you repay kindness with ingratitude…
Do you really not feel who they are and how much they’ve cared for you?
It’s inevitable for everyone to change, but I’m getting scared now.
They started this because they liked music and the stage, but where has that all disappeared to now?
It’s upsetting, truly…”

“After keeping it in after sometime, I’m leaving this message because I feel this has gone too far. Does (he) not remember the old days when we said we’d work hard together? We were happy even when we were practicing. Did (he) really forget the times when we thought going on broadcast even just once felt like a dream? I’d like it if (he) could look in the mirror once again and think whether (he) has forgotten his rookie mindset~ I understood and forgave them for leaving us without a single word so they could find their own paths, but I don’t know why they are making fools out of people who are quietly doing well by saying all kinds of these absurd lies and hurtful sayings.”

“Enemy (敵): An opponent who wants to fight or hurt another.
Ingratitude (背恩忘德): An attitude of one throwing away their indebtedness to someone and betraying them.
In other words, saying that my family wants to fight or hurt another is an attitude of one throwing away their indebtedness to them and betraying them!”

I just don't give a damn on that shit. Although I said this to myself infinity times, but I still can't control myself.  SME really disappointed me. I can't believe those ex-families can insult, affront Junsu like this. I don't want mention their names, what a humiliation. You're completely ruining your image. Thought you guys were happy family? Oh so now who left SME are known as betrayer? So happy family just past tense and no longer present tense? Bull Shit, this is so unreasonable! Please make up for your 'brilliant' minded.

TVXQ for real. I always wishing upon the stars. I wish they'll together again. But now?

I hate two-faced people, now they are. You make me no choice. I hate you. I wish you'll down completely.


Junsu's tweets,


This is not true..this is not how it should be..I came to believe that..I thought we had the same thought..that for the 5 of us, they are the enemy..it looks though that they are not the enemy for all of us..expressing gratitude to those people..who we came to think as our enemy..it seems there's a lot that happened in the time that we cannot be together..I'm so tired;

I intend to..think..and hear only good thoughts..I've been doing that but..it's hard to do that today..even if we're apart..this should not be, hyung..those are the thoughts we used to share..why..why are you like that.




Is that really matter? So please do care your own business, mind your words and keep your mouth shut!

Credit : Banner

The first week, everything is new for me ;

Finally it is Friday! A day that I've been waited for 5 days!

Don't get misunderstood for that. I don't mean that I don't like school or hate school. I love school, of course I love! Remember? I was so excited for first day of the school! I love school, but these days I feel like I'm going to be insufficient. Teachers give lot of assignments. Maybe it is the final year for us, so we have to work harder! Even the timetables for Science Classes have been extending to 2 o'clock, how tiring.

The first week of school is quite tiring actually. I think I've been listened to 10 lectures from my subjects' teachers. I know all the teachers hope we can success in our SPM. They encouraged us to do our things well, so that we'll not give up easily. They also told us tips to success, Lol. Even Physic teacher asked us to do our own resolution for 2011. I wonder what will she replies me after she read my resolution, Hah.
Today our class teacher is funny. She was asking us about what we, students worry about. FOR ME, my worries just simple.

Studies for sure, sleeping hours, homework, tuition, school activities, projects that I’m handling currently, relationship between my family & friends, what to eat for lunch & dinner, when is my favorite artists going to update their Twitter/T-sina, when is TVXQ going to have JYJ+Homin, when is my mum decided to shift the house and lastly of course is MONEY!

Okay I know it is all funny, funny thingy ; Lame, lame thingy. But all these are my worries! I can worry for anything, everything at anytime, every time. That’s why sometime I hate being a girl. Girls have so many emotions & faces. Especially comes to hormone changes, it is really irritating! Why girls just can’t be simply. I think the world will be more peaceful, Lol. That’s a point of mine, no offenses.

That’s something I want to share. I think nowadays the children really been pampered a lot. Yesterday I went into my mum's car after my tuition. And someone parked his/her car at the turning point of the road. It is seriously obstruct the road and even make traffic jam. Hello uncle/aunty, I know you love your children, but can you park the car properly at the proper place? It’s not your area! Then another aunty I guess, she wants her children her child can straight goes into the car right after her child come out from the tuition. So she sit in the car and waiting her child to come out. And she is waiting right at the main road. Everyone behind her keep horning and horning. But I think that lady is a deaf, that’s why she can’t hear anything and move her car. Just because of that stupid car, I reached home 1 hour after my tuition finished, Haih. Uncles & Aunties, can you please think for others first instead of your child?